Interrogation Room One
by Precious Pup
Summary: DUE TO POPULAR DEMAND!Final Chapter Tony stumbles across McGee in a compromising situation in Interrogation Room One. Essentially Tony flipping out about it and how they handle it. Funny.
1. Chapter 1

Gibbs grit his teeth. The Honorable Ava Kimmerson was coming to NCIS. Something about some concerns being raised about the treatment of Veterans during the investigation of some recent cases. She was the last thing he needed to face at this time of the morning. There was no way he had enough coffee in his veins to handle her wandering hands. That reminded him.

He turned to DiNozzo and beckoned him over to his desk. Gibbs leaned across his desk and spoke quietly, wanting to give DiNozzo a warning.

"The Secretary for Public and Intergovernmental Affairs from the Department of Veteran Affairs will be arriving soon. Her name is the Honorable Ava Kimmerson and I _do not_ want you flirting with her or encouraging her in any way."

Tony smiled his dazzling smile "Who me Boss?"

"Yes you Tony. She is a woman of a certain reputation and has been known to eat young men such as yourself for breakfast. So I do not want you adding to the situation. You hear me?"

"Loud and clear Boss" Tony grinned, now undeniably interested in a woman Gibbs felt he should be warned of.

"Should I tell the Probie the same thing?"

Gibbs quirked an eyebrow at him. "I have no concerns about _McGee_ misbehaving or flirting in her presence, Tony."

"Gibbs, I'm hurt." Tony staggered hand over heart and pretended to look shocked as he looked over to where McGee was typing away busily at his reports.

Ava smiled as she stepped off the lift. This was going to be fun. She strode out and headed for the Directors office first. She couldn't resist a quick look across at Timothy's desk as she passed. He was here! She laughed to herself. He didn't know she was coming and she wanted to make sure she remembered the look on his face when she introduced herself to him in front of his team.

Director Sheppard welcomed Ava with a kiss on the cheek. They had spent more than enough time over the years bumping into each other at social and work functions to have established a friendly working relationship.

"You're looking well Ava" Jenny smiled, knowing exactly what that meant. "So are you seeing anyone at the moment?"

"Thank you Jenny. And yes I am. I must recommend to you taking a _younger_ lover. It does wonders for your complexion. Among other things" She grinned evilly and gleefully wiggled her eyebrows at her, reminding Jenny of something Tony might have done.

Jenny simply smiled "So you've got yourself some new hot young thing then. Hopefully he's keeping you out of mischief. Serious?"

"Oh come on Jenny. You forget who you are speaking to. Nope the last marriage was the last. But I must say I am rather fond of him. Hopefully it will be a while until he finds his Miss Right and I can keep him company in the meantime. It's rare to find someone who can actively occupy your body _and_ your mind. Plus he has the most marvelous imagination and….."

Jenny interrupted not really wanting to get into the nitty gritty of who Ava was sleeping with. "Too true. Well I'm glad you're …. keeping busy."

"Oh you have no idea." Ava smirked knowing Jenny didn't know who it was that had been keeping her company over the last five months.

"Right then. Let's look at these complaints and see what we can do about them so I can get out of your hair. Would I be able to meet Gibbs and his team, as it seems these complaints are arising as a direct result of their ……..shall we say rather direct methods of questioning."

Tony watched as a rather spectacular pair of legs came down the stairs, accompanying the Director. Ah this must be the woman from Veterans Affairs, Gibbs had warned him about.

He watched as she took in the team as they were introduced to her, except for McGee who had disappeared down to Abby's Lab a few minutes earlier. The Honorable Ava Kimmerson had a firm handshake and moist lips but seemed entirely well behaved. If she was capable of mischief it didn't seem to be on display today. Tony idly wondered what she had done to earn Gibbs ill favor.

Ava cursed Timothy's impeccable timing that had sent him out of the room moments before she arrived. Still she could still have some fun with him later.

Ava saw a very cute and recognizable figure heading towards her with his head down reading reports along the hallway. Finally!

She stepped into the empty Interrogation room and snagged his jacket as he walked past, firmly pulling him into the room and locking the door behind him.

"Ava! What are you doing here?" Timothy's eyes were shocked as he took in his sudden change of surroundings.

"Hello Timothy" She purred and rubbed herself against him, pushing him into the corner against the wall. She ran her hands up his chest and gripped the lapels of his jacket, leaning into him.

"Um Ava. We really shouldn't be doing this here. This is my _work! _This is_ Interrogation!"_

"Oh come on Timothy. What's a little kiss? Besides don't you get sick and tired of being so damn good and proper all the time?"

She knew full well that he did and it was part of what attracted him to her. The adventure of it all. The secret. The danger. It was also what stressed him about her. She watched his eyes track to the door and knew she had him even if just for a minute.

"It's locked. And Gibbs and the others have headed out to get some witness statements or something. Gone for at least and hour and a half I believe."

"This is ummmm Interrogation" Tim mumbled through a warm kiss placed on his lips

"Yes I know" Ava leaned in for another kiss of his pillowy soft sweet lips.

"This isn't ummmm a ummmm good ummm idea."

Ava switched tactic and started kissing down the side of his long sensitive neck.

Tim moaned quietly, his eyes fluttering closed before he surged up from the wall grabbed her shoulders with both strong hands and switched places so he was the one pressing her against the wall, pinning her with his body. Oh yeah, there he was.

Tony ducked into Interrogation Room One where he had been earlier looking for his phone. This was the last place he remembered having it as he had been playing Tetris on it while waiting for Gibbs to come in.

Ah there it was! On the edge of the table. He turned and …

_PROBIE!_

No it couldn't be. IT COULDN"T BE!

Tony didn't know if he wanted to stand still in shock or if he wanted to jump up and down and squeal in delight. He shoved his fist in his mouth, his eyes growing wider as he reeled about the room.

There was Timothy McGee pinning the Honorable Ava Kimmerson with his body against the wall in the corner of the room and they WERE KISSING!

They were more than kissing they were totally MAKING OUT! Here in Interrogation! They were using tongue!

Arrgghhhh

Oh Boy! And Gibbs had had no worries about McGee! Hah! Wait until he found out about THIS. Tony stared fascinated, still gob smacked, his head slowly tilting to the side as he tried to get a better view. In four years he didn't think he had ever seen McGee kiss anyone, well not properly anyway. He looked like he was certainly putting his back into it and she seemed to be enjoying it, her hands running through his hair and up his back pulling him in closer.

In fact it looked like they were a bit too comfortable for this to be their first time doing…

Argggghhhhh

Tony jumped, at the sudden loud sound of his phone ringing. He grabbed at it not wanting them to realize he was here and he fumbled it in his desperation. Up the phone went and he grabbed again, juggling it from one hand to another across the room until he was able to regain hold of it.

He stabbed at the button 'SHHHHHUUUUSSSHHHH' being the first thing out of his mouth as he flicked his eyes to the couple in the other room beyond the glass to see if they noticed the interruption.

"Did you just SHUSH me DiNozzo?"

Oh Shit. Gibbs.

"Ahh sorry Boss." Tony whispered, wincing. Should he say something? He needed to speak to McGee first and find out what the hell was going on!

"Just get your butt out to the car now, Tony."

"Ok Boss" Tony stood watching with horrified fascination as McGee's hand slid over the Honorable Ava Kimmersons knee and onto her warm outer thigh, slowly gathering up ripples of fabric in its wake.

"Where ARE you DiNozzo? And why are you whispering?" Gibbs voice had a warning tone and Tony's mind went blank as McGee's hand crept ever higher and she arched into his touch.

VOYOUR was the only word that seemed to be registering with Tony's brain in that instant. McGee started kissing her neck and nibbling at her ear and her head fell to the side and she looked through the glass…… right at him. She could see him!

Arrgggghhhh!

She couldn't see him. She _couldn't_ see him. He knew that the glass was mirrored. It was Interrogation! He had been in there a thousand times. It just seemed like she was watching him, watching them, with bruised lips and half closed heated eyes. And heaving breaths. Oh my god if his hand gets any higher!

"DiNozzo!"

Arrggghhh

"Yes Boss"

"I said where are you?"

"I'm looking for my phone. I ……I couldn't find it and now….."

"Yes and now?"

"I've found it"

"Good well like I said, get you're…..

A surprisingly loud desperate woman's moan came through from the other room.

"Are you watching PORN DINOZZO?!"

Tony clamped the phone to his shoulder and furiously flicked switches and pulled down levers trying to kill the sound feed from the other room. It was so easy to do normally. Why couldn't his brain just cooperate with him…..just because Probie was practically having sex with someone a few meters away…..

Arrgghhhhh

"Ah just a second Boss. Ahhhhh No Boss of course not. I'll be out there in a second!" Tony flicked the phone shut knowing he would pay for it later but willing to risk that rather than Gibbs listening to more McPorn.

Tony turned and closed his eyes not wanting to see exactly how much further the kissing and touching had proceeded. Holy crap! Was that a button undone? He peeked and screwed his eyes back shut tight. Ok brain get back in order.

He needed to leave. Right now! And he needed to go somewhere…. Where? Ok yes the car…. He needed to meet Gibbs at the car.

And after he had survived that he needed to have a serious talk with McGee!

Oh my God talk about invasion of the body snatchers. There was no way that that man in there was Timothy McGee. He snuck another peak and watched his jacket being pushed off his shoulders to fall to the floor.

Arrrgghhhh

Go Now! He turned and with his eyes still shut held out his hands and fumbled his way to the door, making it with only one small crash into the door frame.

Tony stood and took a deep heaving breath in the corridor. He felt like his heart hurt from the series of small shocks it had recently received and was going a million miles an hour. What to do? What if someone else came in? McGee would be ruined if he didn't kill himself in embarrassment first.

Tony reached in and flicked the inside lock on the door and pulled it shut behind him. Never let it be said that Tony didn't look out for McGee when he could.

With shaking steps Tony headed down the hallway trying to rid his brain of the sound of the moan running through his head. Ok so Probie wasn't a virgin. Good to know.

(Come on people and let me know what you think. Review! Please?)


	2. Chapter 2

Tony stared at McGee. Nothing. Not a hair out of place. He wasn't wearing his spare shirt or anything obvious like that. It had been driving him crazy since he had come back into the office with the rest of the team.

Did McGee have sex with the Honorable Ava Kimmerson in Interrogation One?

It just didn't seem possible looking at him now, calmly typing away head down, diligent as usual.

But he couldn't have dreamed it could he? Why would he be dreaming about McGee having sex anyway? Talk about a fantasy. Weird.

Gibbs looked up to find Tony watching McGee. Again. He sighed. What was going on between those two? Tony had been jumpy for the last couple of hours. McGee on the other hand looked like nothing had happened. Gibbs smiled. He hoped McGee had finally got something on DiNozzo for a change. Well he was sure it would all come out soon or later knowing those two. He put his head down and continued working.

Tony got up and sauntered casually past McGee's desk.

"Hungry Probie?"

"Uh no Tony. Thanks I've already had lunch."

Damn Tony was always hungry after sex.

"Are you tired? Sleepy McGee?"

"Uh no not really Tony."

What the hell was Tony on about? Then again Tony was often confusing him with nothing, just to annoy him. It was probably leading up to some practical joke or something. Thank goodness he wasn't even in the building when Ava dragged him into Interrogation One.

And he had checked the door when he left. Not only had Ava locked them in she had locked the door to Observation on the other side too. At least one of them managed to keep their head. He must admit it had put his mind at ease. He had picked the lock and popped it open so no one would wonder why it was locked from the inside.

"Sweaty McGee? Are you sweaty? Do you want a shower? Do you feel the overwhelming need to get clean?" Tony was leaning over him now, watching him intently.

"What are you talking about DiNozzo? Why did you stick something on my chair? You have haven't you?"

Tony huffed and walked away waiving his hand. "Calm down, no I haven't stuck anything on your chair"

Tony sank down into his chair and continued to stare at McGee who just looked confused with his brows pulled together, before with a quick look at Gibbs shrugged and returned to his work.

Damn Probie was getting good at the poker face thing. There was nothing for it he would have to ask him straight out. He stared until he was boring a hole into the top of McGee's head. Any second now.

McGee lifted his head up, annoyed now "What?"

Tony saw Ziva and Gibbs raise their heads at McGee tone. "Nothing"

McGee narrowed his eyes at Tony, who flicked his head towards the elevator trying to signal to him that he needed a private word with him.

McGee just stuck his head on the side like a dog trying to work out what its master was saying. Tony quickly flicked his head towards the elevator again.

"Got a problem with your neck DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked trying to keep the smile off his face as he continued head down at his desk.

"Arhhh No Boss" How did Gibbs do that? Tony glared at McGee and risked one more flick of his head at McGee.

"You better go with DiNozzo to the elevator, McGee before he does himself an injury" Gibbs smirked as Tony cursed and realization dawned in McGee's eyes.

"Thanks Boss" Tony gritted out through his teeth.

"No problem Tony. Any time I can be of help" Gibbs smirked as he watched the two of them head towards the elevator, McGee definitely bemused at the turn of events.

Tony waited until the doors closed on both of them, counted to 5 and then flicked the emergency switch. He turned to McGee quickly, startling him causing him to take a step back and end up against the elevator wall.

"Just what the hell did you think you were doing kissing the honorable Ms Kimmerson in Interrogation Room One?"

McGee just stared at him his jaw dropping in shock.

"You saw! You weren't even in the building!"

"Oh no my sneaky little friend. I was missing my phone which I left there earlier and when I went to collect it…."

"But the door was locked. I checked!"

Tony, Gibbs slapped him. Hard. "Who do you think locked it? I didn't want anyone else walking in on you two doing…. whatever it was that you were doing."

McGee just stared at him "Oh No! I've NEVER done anything like that before….. well ok there was that one thing with Abby …. In the Lab……….But she said no would ever find out… and ..and …. you didn't know about that either did you?"

Tony just stared back at him aghast "You had sex at work! In the Lab! With Abby?"

McGee shuffled his feet blushing furiously "Well I suppose you would classify it as sex…."

Argghhhhh Tony Gibbs slapped him again. Harder.

"What was that for?"

"That was for Abby in the lab. The first one was for Kimmerson. And this" Tony reached over and slapped McGee again "Was for not telling me about any of this"

"Please Tony anymore head slaps and I might get concussion. And stop poking me in the chest. I bruise easily. Look I didn't plan on any of it happening. They just start running their hands all over me and……. "

BING

The elevator doors slid open to reveal Gibbs, Ziva and Abby staring at the two of them cozied up in the corner of the elevator.

Tony stared at the emergency switch.

"I don't remember flicking that back on?"

Gibbs smiled wryly. "It's not working very well. Someone been using it a bit to much"

"Well you could have told me Boss!"

"Well once you have finished doing whatever you were doing to McGee, there is work to be done you know"

There was an instant as everyone stared at the others. Tony had McGee pinned up against the wall and he was looking distinctly startled and rumpled. His hair was mussed from the head slaps, his fringe falling over the front of his face and a distinct sheen of sweat had broken out on his brow and as he faced the three of them he flushed an even deeper shade of pink.

"Right. Ok then. I think we will finish this little chat later then McGee" Tony smoothed down the front of McGee shirt and backed away from him while McGee's mouth opened and closed like a fish trying to say something that would make this whole thing seem completely normal.

Abby winked at him and McGee shut his mouth with a snap.

"This is not what it looks like!"

"Sure what is it about them? Humm" Ziva watched the two of them with a smothered smile on her face.

The two of them looked at each other

"Nothing"

(Come on people review. One more chpater to go to round it out)


	3. Chapter 3

Suddenly a new case was on and Tony didn't have a chance to talk to McGee again until he was standing beside him sketching the scene. Tony rounded on him. And poked him in the chest again, firmly.

"You didn't answer my question back there Probie." Tony kept his voice low, his eyes darting to where Gibbs was talking to a State Trooper.

"What question was that Tony. " McGee hedged knowing what was coming, trying to look busy.

"What were you doing with the Secretary for Veterans Affairs in Interrogation back at Headquarters?"

"Ahhh what did it look like we were doing?"

McGee wasn't sure exactly how much Tony had seen and he didn't want to give him anymore information than he already had. He would rather chew his own arm off than discuss his sex life with DiNozzo of all people and it was disturbing him no end to know that Tony might have actually watched some of it. I mean did he look up, realize and go straight away? Or did he…..you know … watch?

McGee wanted to know but he really didn't want to ask. And if he asked how would he know Tony would even tell him the right answer?

Tony gave McGee a dark look. "It looked like you were showing her the finer points of your tonsils……… plus a view other things."

"Ahhh what other things?"

"I'm disturbed enough about it without repeating it to you so just answer the question" Tony leaned into McGee's space again and placed a warning hand on his chest.

McGee had genuinely forgotten the question in the stress of not revealing whatever it was Tony didn't know. He sighed. He wasn't very good at this game and Tony was very persistent. He was starting to sweat again. Yech.

"DiNozzo!"

"Yeah Boss?"

"Stop whatever it is you're doing to McGee. I think it's pretty obvious he doesn't like it."

Gibbs smiled as he heard a smothered curse from Tony and watched as McGee blushed to the tips of his ears. The two men stepped away from each other and continued their work. A moment later their conversation started up again, quietly.

"Look Tony, its no big deal. Ava and I have been…."

"Wait Ava? You mean you two have been ….before?" Tony suggestively wiggled his eyebrows and stared at McGee.

"Yes Tony."

"I knew it! But she's Veterans Affairs. And she's old! She's hot but she's old! She has to be a decade older than you if a day"

McGee coughed and pulled the camera up in front of his face to take another shot. He hoped it would hide some of the blush creeping over his face.

"Fifteen actually"

Tony choked. "Fifteen? Damn McGee what the hell are you doing?"

"Well it just sort of happened"

"It just sort of HAPPENED? What did she do? Order you to have sex with her?"

McGee rolled his eyes. "Of course not Tony, don't be silly" He pulled the camera up again and Tony could hear the smirk in his voice "Well not the first time anyway"

Tony shot McGee another dirty look as he squatted to get closer to the ground and the body of the dead ensign.

"Look Tony it's no big deal….. to me. I mean we're all adults here. Well I mean even you have your good days. If you want to go ahead and tell everyone that I'm errrr casually seeing Ava Kimmerson then that's your call. And I don't think she cares either way. But I would prefer that you kept whatever you saw in Interrogation to yourself though."

Tony looked up considering his friend, whose blush was denying his calm voice.

"So you wouldn't mind if I walked up to Gibbs right now and said Hey Boss I thought you should know that McGee and the Honorable Ms Kimmerson have been doing the horizontal mambo for…… How long?"

"About five months"

"Five Months! And you never said a word! Ohhhh Timothy you have been a naughty boy" McGee flushed again, moving around the scene.

Tony flicked his eyes across to Gibbs, then back and continued to sketch "By the way I totally don't buy that you're cool with this. If I walked up to Gibbs right now and told him you would have a heart attack. Otherwise you would have mentioned it before. I mean what you just haven't had the opportunity to say something to him in private in over five months?"

McGee squirmed "Errrrhhhhh Ok look it was just a nothing that became a something that sort of got out of control."

"Out of control all right. You nearly gave me a heart attack. What if the Director had walked in? You would be out on your tattooed butt quicker than you could blink"

There was silence as McGee moved around the site taking different shots of the scene considering just that scenario.

"Please don't say anything Tony." McGee looked at Tony with the sad pleading puppy dog look on his face that he just couldn't say no to.

"Alright. Just don't get your panties in a twist. And no more sex in the building. I don't care who it's with."

McGee grinned happily. "Thanks Tony"

There was a few minutes of delicious silence before Tony spoke again.

"By the way McGee, did you and Ava... you know actually..."

"Actually what Tony?" McGee tried to keep the smile out of his voice. He hadn't seen much at all then!

"You know what Im asking _Probie_"

"Tony, you know I don't kiss and tell!" McGee laughed quietly to himself as Tony started on a long monologue about how guys should share all their secrets, especially if it involved women. And sex.

Gibbs watched the two men talking. They seemed to have worked out whatever had got Tony all worked up. Good. It wasn't good to have divisions in the team. Tony really should stop touching McGee so much though. It just got him all hot and bothered. And embarrassed.

Gibbs smiled as at the end of a long day Ducky stepped into the elevator along with the Director.

"Ah Jethro. Just the man I wanted to speak to. So how long has young Timothy been seeing the delicious Ava Kimmerson?"

Gibbs swore he actually felt the elevator shift sideways on him and he looked up and stared at Jenny.

"What? McGee and Ava?"

"Oh yes I interrupted the two of them in the stairwell this afternoon. In a rather compromising situation too I might add. I don't think they noticed me though. Too busy with each other. You seem to know everything around here so I thought you would know."

Jenny considered the conversation she had earlier and looked at Gibbs with startled eyes. "Oh my God. McGee is Ava's hot young thing?"

Gibbs cursed himself. DiNozzo was right. He should have warned McGee.

So what do you think people? Did McGee actually go the full Monty. Curious to know what people think.


	4. Chapter 4

"DiNozzo!"

"What? No I said McGee was Ava's Boy Toy, not Tony"

Gibbs just shot Jen an exasperated look.

"No. I mean the two of them have been acting weird all day. I bet Tony knew about it. And he didn't tell me. Knowing DiNozzo he's probably blackmailing McGee right now"

"Ah well I didn't mean for any of them to get into trouble over it. I just assumed you knew…..well I mean it is Timothy and I was surprised at his choice of partner."

"That's ok Duck. It sounds like if it wasn't you then it was going to be someone who saw them. I mean the stairwell?? I thought he was supposed to be some sort of genius?" Gibbs sighed and ran his hands through his hair.

Jen just shook her head. "For now I'm going to pretend we aren't having this conversation. If I know _officially_ then I'm officially going to have to take action and it's not going to look good on McGee's record. Personally I think Ava's more responsible but I can't take her to task. Jethro, do you think you could have a little word with McGee about his err… personal pursuits…. and choice of location? "

"I'm looking forward to speaking to _both_ of them" Gibbs smiled grimly.

"McGee! DiNozzo! Conference now!" Gibbs strode through the Bullpen and the two agents looked up startled. With a quick glance across at each other they both bolted up behind Gibbs and stepped into the elevator.

Gibbs waited a moment and then switched on the emergency switch shutting the elevator down. Then he turned and looked at the two of them.

"Is there anything you two would like to say to me?"

The two men looked at each other before McGee burst out. "Tony you told him?!"

"I didn't say a word, Probie!"

"Yeah right. How did Gibbs find out then? You just couldn't help yourself could you DiNozzo? You and your big damn mouth. You've been waiting years to have something to pin on me, haven't you?"

"Hey we wouldn't be in this situation if you could just keep your damn trousers on! Mr. I'm so moral and perfect and I don't do fantasy's and I think porn is sleazy. Don't you suddenly have a go at me. I'm not the one having sex in a Federal Building!"

Gibbs watched for an instant as the two men glared each other down.

"Hey you two!" Gibbs smacked them both on the back of the head, bringing their attention back to him with a groan "Ducky told me!"

"Ducky told you? "

"How the hell did _Ducky_ find out about McGee having sex in Interrogation Room One? I locked the door behind me."

Gibbs just stared, shocked at Tony for an instant and McGee and Tony glanced across at each other with worried looks.

"Uh oh"

"Uh Oh? That's what you have got to say? Uh oh?" It was rare that Gibbs was surprised but this was one of those times.

"This wasn't about McGee having sex in Interrogation was it?" Tony gulped while Tim closed his eyes and broke out into a sweat.

Gibbs turned his attention back to McGee as his mind processed McGee and presumably Ava in Interrogation _while Tony watched_.

He didn't actually know what disturbed him more. You were meant to be close as partners but he didn't think they were _that_ close.

"Wait!" Gibbs had a sudden thought about what he had heard earlier that day.

"The … the porn? That's was McGee?" Gibbs stared at DiNozzo who winced in embarrassment while McGee turned to Tony.

"He heard!! Not only did you _watch_ but Gibbs _heard_?!" Tim gaped at Tony, the cogs in his brain having now shut down completely.

"It wasn't my fault! I was looking for my phone and Gibbs called me when you two were… you know getting into it. He thought I was watching porn! Hey if you two didn't want anyone to hear you could have shut off the sound feed. Or even better do what I did and lock the damn door. You know doors McGee? They keep people out? Big flat solid things often with handles? You use them everyday? Should I point them out to you?"

Tim didn't respond to Tony's sarcasm as he was just too humiliated and weirded out by two of the people he would _least_ like to be involved in any sexual activity of his, now being involved, even in some minor fashion. How much did Gibbs hear? The begging, the swearing or just the errr….. the moaning?

There was a long silence as each man processed their individual thoughts, mostly involving McGee having sex.

Gibbs shut his eyes and shaking his head started again. "No Tony, this was about Ducky seeing McGee and the Honorable Ms Kimmerson together in the _stairwell_. And you're here because I figured you knew about it."

Tony started and then turned to McGee again, his jaw dropping while McGee squirmed. "The stairwell? I mean seriously… Interrogation….. but the stairwell? There aren't any doors! Or walls! Of course someone is going to see you there, you idiot. That's like teenage sex 101" Tony reached over and slapped the back of McGee's head.

"Hey Boss. I don't see why I should get in trouble because McGee and his new kinky girlfriend have developed a passion for public sex."

"Wait did you say girlfriend?" Gibbs was trying to keep up with the conversation, but kept getting stuck on the sound of the woman's hitched breathy moan running through his head. McGee caused that?

"Yeah, they have been seeing each other on the side for months now. Isn't that right McGee?" Tony turned to look at McGee who hadn't said a word in several minutes and had screwed his eyes shut as if he could happily fall through the floor.

Gibbs turned to McGee "Care to join this conversation McGee?

"Uhhh No not really Boss."

Gibbs reached over and slapped McGee on the back of the head "That's for the stairwell" and then he did it again "And that's for Interrogation"

Tony couldn't help it. He laughed. McGee was looking more than a bit flustered after his fourth Gibbs slap in as many minutes.

"Hey Chuckle head!" Gibbs reached over and slapped Tony on the back of head.

"Oww what's that for?"

"You were watching him DiNozzo! I can't believe you two!"

Tony opened his mouth to say something further to defend himself and then decided it was probably best that he didn't. Anything he said would just make him sound like a pervert. Instead he joined McGee in a murmured Sorry Boss as they considered exactly how long it would be before they got out of the elevator alive.

"So McGee exactly how often have you had sex at work? And don't even think abut lying to me." Gibbs turned and stared at the agent he never thought he would be having this conversation with.

Tim looked up and flushed. "Well that's an interesting question, Boss. Do you really mean how many uhhh _times _or do you mean uhhhhh how many different _woman_ or uhhh how many uhh _places_ at work."

McGee looked at them both for a sign to continue then rallied himself with a deep breath and much shuffling of feet and continued.

"There's the stairwell and Interrogation. You know about those but umm… there's also Ballistics, the Lab ….ummm the Conference Room…." McGee looked like he was going to continue but with a look at their faces trailed off.

Tony and Gibbs just stared at McGee in the tiny elevator. Suddenly both of them reached over and slapped him on the back of the head.

"Owww' Tim wondered if being repeatedly head slapped for sexual activities at work could be covered under his work medical policy.

"When the hell did you get so popular?" Tony demanded

Tim looked thoughtful "Um about the time I got the Porsche?"

"That was a rhetorical question McGee!!"

"Oh. Sorry"

Gibbs sucked in a deep breath. Man this elevator was getting hot with the three of them in there. How was he going to get McGee out of this?

Gibbs looked up at McGee who had a sort of 'what?' expression on his face and was returning Tony's glare.

"I will say this only once McGee. Did you have sex in Interrogation Room One?"

"Yes Boss I…."

Gibbs glared and head slapped him again. He spoke slowly trying to get genius to understand what he _wasn't _saying.

"Listen carefully to what I'm saying McGee. This could affect your career here. And depending on your answer I'm going to have to go to Director Sheppard and report you. So did you have sex in Interrogation One?"

McGee watched what Gibbs was saying, very confused. His voice was saying one thing but his body language another. He started again.

"Yesssss I.." He watched as Gibbs rolled his eyes then turned back to him and started shaking his head. He tried again.

"Noooooo I "Gibbs was now nodding his head firmly at McGee. Oh he wanted him to deny it! Tim grinned happily now he knew what footing he was on. Gibbs sighed.

"No Boss I didn't have sex in Interrogation Room One."

"Good. Thank you McGee. Now you will NEVER have sex at work again do you hear me?"

"Yes Boss."

"And that goes for you to DiNozzo."

"Hey what did I do?" Tony pouted indignant that his good behavior was being called into question because of super freak beside him.

"Don't get me started on you Tony. Now let's get the hell out of this elevator before we all melt." Gibbs reached over and flicked on the emergency switch, jolting the elevator into action.

"Oh and by the way McGee" Tony head slapped him for good measure.

"What was that for!?"

"You accusing me of ratting you out to Gibbs!"

The elevator door opened on the three sweaty, flushed men. Abby and Ziva stared at the three of them, taking in once again McGee's rumpled appearance.

"Really you _three_?" Ziva teased. "No wonder the elevators always out."

"Oh have you been naughty Timmy?" Abby crowed, laughing.

"You have no idea Abb's" Gibbs shook his head and stepped out leaving Tony and McGee to follow.

"I…I think I have concussion." Tim was a bit wobbly on his feet as he rubbed his head from more Gibbs slaps than he could count. At least he still had his career.

"Oh poor Timmy. Come here." Abby opened up her arms and McGee stepped into her embrace and snuggled into her, comfortingly after such a hideous few minutes.

Gibbs turned and saw him. "Hey McGee. And no sex in the elevator either!"

The End!

(Thanks for all the reviews and good feedback on this silly little story. It was supposed to be one chapter and kind of blew out to four. Hope you like it!)


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